


I Saw You

by Akiko_Natsuko



Series: Genciotober [1]
Category: Overwatch (Video Game)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Genciotober, Hope, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Memories, Mutual Pining, Requited Love, Requited Unrequited Love, Serious Injuries
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-03
Updated: 2018-10-03
Packaged: 2019-07-24 01:23:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16170725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Akiko_Natsuko/pseuds/Akiko_Natsuko
Summary: A mission gone awry leads to realisations for both Genji and Lucio.“Tell me again when you’re not falling asleep,” Genji murmured, feeling the hand holding his go lax and begin to fall away, catching it before it could hit the bed and smiling as he realised that Lucio was already asleep, chest rising and falling evenly. He squeezed Lucio’s fingers before lifting to his lips and pressing a kiss to the tips, as he added softly. “And then I might believe you.”





	I Saw You

    Genji grumbled under his breath as Angela shifted one of the wires in his wrist, the connection sparking slightly and sending a vibration up his arm, the sensation tingling as it finally reached flesh. It tickled and burnt in equal measure, and it took everything he had to hold himself still, not wanting to draw another scolding down on his head, especially as Angela’s lips were still pursed from the sharp words that she had greeted him with. Instead, he tried to distract himself, but the sensation washed over him again, and he sighed, realising that it was a lost cause. It was one of the many things about this body that he had never fully adjusted to, but he didn’t shy away from it, tilting his head to watch as she finished working on the delicate wiring in his wrist.

     _Not human,_ the small voice that was so rarely heard these days resurfaced for a minute, and whereas in the past he would have pulled away from human touch or lashed out, now he anchored himself, gripping the bed with his free hand and taking a deep breath. One, two and then another, and as he focused on breathing, refusing to dwell on the sensation of oxygen passing through the artificial parts of his chest, and instead letting Zenyatta’s voice echo through his mind as he pushed those thoughts out and instead clung to another.

_I am more than this body._

    It was a thought that came easier these days, eased by the long months under Zenyatta’s guidance, learning to accept who and what he was, and the months since returning to Overwatch and surrounding himself with friends. With family. With a future – he faltered a little at the last one, a different voice and face popping into his mind at that thought… _a brilliant smile and a warm arm around his shoulder_ …and he jumped when another vibration ran up his arm, jolting him back to the present. He blinked, relieved that Angela was focused elsewhere and that she had no idea where his thoughts had wandered too.

“You’re a much better patient these days,” Angela murmured, unaware of his distraction, all traces of her earlier annoyance gone, replaced by a gentle teasing. She had been cautious around him when he’d first answered the recall, undoubtedly remembering his temper from before the Fall, the way he had lashed out at anything and anyone. It had been a painful reminder of what he’d been like in those days, and in turn, he had been cautious in his approach. However, there was only so long that could hold up under the current situation – close quarters and their small numbers meaning that distance and caution had to be set aside, and without his temper to block the way, they had become friends. It was why he didn’t tense at her words, instead offering her a grin.

“You’re scarier than you were back then.” She could be too when the mood took her, and he’d already felt the edge of that temper when he’d had a close encounter with Doomfist a couple of months ago and nearly ended up shattered into pieces. It made her sharpness when he’d turned up an hour ago with a busted wrist from a dare gone awry look like the tenderest lullaby, and he feigned fear when she shot him a wicked smile. That more than anything told him that it was fixed and that he was forgiven, even before she gently slid the casing back into place and took a step back.

“As good as new,” she faltered, and he sighed, feeling the unpleasant voice trying to clamour for attention once more. “Tell Jesse that if I see him, he’s in trouble,” she continued after a moment, and the tension that formed, dissipated just like that and Genji couldn’t stop himself from chuckling. Jesse had seen him to the infirmary door and then bolted in a jangle of spurs before Angela could catch him, and he weighed up the possibility of ensuring that the two crossed paths as payback for being abandoned to her tender mercies. “I saw that expression, Genji Shimada.”

“I…”

     His protest was cut short as the door to the infirmary crashed open, and Jesse came tearing inside, his hat flapping behind him and expression frantic.

“Angela, you’re needed in the hangar.” Angela was already moving as he skidded to a halt, all humour draining from her features as she reached for her staff and emergency bag even before he added. “We have injured incoming.”

    It was a common enough occurrence these days, especially with their numbers and the lack of supplies and support as they were forced to continue working under the radar as the U.N. had refused to repeal the Petras Act. In fact, Genji could probably count on one hand the number of missions lately that had come back with no injuries, and he grimaced, briefly reassuring himself with the knowledge that at least Jesse and Hanzo were currently on the base and therefore out of danger. However, the relief was short-lived, a sinking feeling rapidly replacing it and he wasn’t aware of springing to his feet.

“Who?” It came out louder and harsher than he intended, emotions that he wasn’t ready to put a name to churning in his chest as they both turned to look at him, startled by the sudden panic. “Who’s injured?” _There’s more than one team in the field. It won’t be him,_ the reassurances fell flat even as he thought them, not least because he felt an immediate surge of guilt for wishing that it would be someone, anyone else. Yet, at the same time, all he could he see at that moment was a too bright grin and flashes of green, so similar and yet so different from his own, and there was a roaring in his ears that wasn’t enough to deafen Jesse’s reply.

“Lúcio…”

****

      Genji had no recollection of reaching the hangar, and yet here he was, pacing behind where Angela, Winston and Jesse stood watching and listening to the limited information that Athena was able to relay to them. He had stopped listening after hearing Hana’s voice crack and break, the Meka pilot giving voice to her fear in a way that she never normally allowed herself. However, it had been enough to ignite every single fear that had roared to life in the infirmary, and he couldn’t stay still, pacing back and forth, fingers constantly in motion as he ran a shuriken between them. He wished that Zenyatta was there, needing something to ground him, as it felt like he might fly apart under the storm of emotions engulfing him.

“Genji?” He whirled as fingers brushed his shoulder, coming up short as Hanzo took a step backwards and held up his hands to show that he wasn’t a threat. There was an apology on the tip of his tongue, but Hanzo cut him off. “I didn’t realise you were so close to Lúcio?” The curiosity was new and genuine, Hanzo finally trying, tentatively to bridge the distance he had been maintaining between them, and that was what stopped Genji from snapping, as instead, he sighed, shoulders slumping.

“I-I’m not.” _I just wish…_

“Yet you wish you were?” Hanzo asked, unconsciously echoing his thoughts and Genji knew that his jerk had just answered the question, and he sighed before nodding. 

He wished for many things…

    He wished that they’d had a different upbringing, that the Shimada clan hadn’t pushed and pulled them until they’d broken. That Hanzo had been strong enough to resist their orders, that he’d had the words to stop his brother that night. At one point he had wished that he had died, anything to escape this strange, metallic body that didn’t belong to him. Later, he had wished to bring the world crashing down, and then it had. Then he’d wished to find himself, to find a path…and that wish had come true, as had the hopes of bringing Hanzo back from the edge, as proven by the fact that his brother was stood by his side watching him with concerned eyes. It had been enough to start him wishing for more things, for shooting stars that had always been out of reach before and for a warm smile and an unflinching touch.  “I didn’t realise…”

    Genji snorted at the quiet words, before the brief spark of humour faded. “Neither did I.” No, that was a lie. Genji had spent so long trying to come to terms with what he was, and what had happened to him, that it was hard to lie to himself about anything. Especially about something – and someone – who had been consuming far more of his thoughts than he would ever admit to, even under his brother’s worried gaze. However, he hadn’t realised how deep those feelings ran, or how far past the point of attraction he had moved in the last few months and he glanced away, hands curling into fists at his side. “Neither did I…” The words were like bile this time, because he had wished and hoped, and now… now it might be too late, and this time he couldn’t silence the negative voice.

“Genji, you…” The dull roar of a plane’s engines drowned out whatever else Hanzo was saying, but Genji would’ve been deaf to his words regardless, his attention riveted on the dropship now making its approach towards them. Even at this distance there was no mistaking the damage it had sustained, or the smoke coming from the left-hand engine, and its approach was jerky, nothing like Lena’s normal flying and he found himself backing away, feeling rather than seeing his brother echoing his movements.

   The landing was rough, and Genji knew that he wasn’t the only one with his heart in his mouth as it skidded and there was a muffled boom from the smoking engine. However, even as Athena’s systems swung into action and Winston and Jesse moved forwards to assist, the side door opened with an ear-piercing shriek, and it was still lowering when Hana appeared, covered in dirt and her flight suit torn and scorched, although she didn’t seem to be injured as she frantically waved.

“ANGELA!”

     Angela disappeared onboard, and Genji wanted to follow, even took an unsteady step after her, before the memory slammed into him.

_Pain._

_His entire world had narrowed down to pain, he wasn’t sure where it began or where it ended. - If it even had a beginning or an end. It burned, cold and hot, stealing his words as his head lolled to the side, trying to make sense of what was happening around him, distantly aware of the high-pitched beeping that had joined the cacophony in the plane. Some, small distant part of his mind knew that he should be worried by the noise, but he lacked the strength or will to care, his eyes beginning to drift shut as he heard a panicked voice somewhere to his left._

_“Angela! We’re losing him!”_

_“What…?” A new voice, one that he didn’t recognise from the words that had floated around him during the journey to wherever this place was, and he blinked, startled to discover that he could still do so. His vision was blurring, but he could make out a shape leaning over, pale features indistinct although the long blonde hair suggested it was a woman, as did the voice which was much closer this time. “What’s his name?”_

_“Genji?” Someone must’ve replied for him because he was struggling to breathe, let alone speak right now. “Genji can you hear me?” His mouth open and closed, but the words wouldn’t come, and he could feel himself spiralling down into the darkness, welcoming it as the pain rose and then ebbed, seeping away with his consciousness._

“Genji.”

    Another voice was calling his name, fingers squeezing his shoulder as he jolted, pulled back into the present, realising that his breath was coming hard and fast…and that there was a flurry of activity at the plane. He blinked, sparing a second to realise that it was Hanzo gripping his shoulder, before focusing on the others as Jesse moved forward to help Hana and Angela lower the gurney from the dropship. And it felt like all the air had been forced from his lungs as he caught a familiar flash of green, obscured by red and white as someone had pulled a blanket over him.

“No…” He wasn’t aware of the whispered protest that slipped free, or that he had tried to move forward, at least until he was pulled to a halt. There was a hand on his shoulder, holding him back as the group walked past where they were stood, not that he could’ve moved in that instant, because for a fleeting second his gaze met Lúcio’s. The medic’s eyes were heavy-lidded, his gaze unfocused, but for half a second it seemed as though he recognised Genji, mouth moving as though attempting to speak, revealing the blood staining his teeth. Then they were gone, Angela’s voice rising urgently and all Genji could do was watch as they faded from sight, refusing to let her words register, as he clung to the fact that Lúcio was still alive.

_Lúcio…_

****

Just.

    Hours had passed since Hanzo had led him back inside, sitting with him in the uncomfortable chairs lining the hallway outside the infirmary, not speaking, but there in a way that he had never been in the past. At any other time Genji would have been able to marvel at how far they had come, but for now, he was unable to focus on anything but the thoughts darting around like lightning in his mind, and the wishes that he hadn’t allowed himself to acknowledge until now. Hana had sat with them for a while, before being called away to fill Winston in one what had gone wrong, and she hadn’t been able to tell them anything, sitting in silence and staring at the doors with a pale face and haunted gaze, which had done nothing to settle his fears.

   The feeling of _too late_ lingered too, intensifying with her departure and wrapping tighter and tighter with each minute that passed without news.

It shouldn’t be taking this long.

     Genji knew better than anyone what Angela was capable of, even with their reduced supplies and capabilities. Hell, she’d managed to piece him back together under these circumstances… so what could be taking so long? What if…? He cut that thought off, not letting it take root, because if he did, then he would be lost entirely, and he sighed, burying his head in his hands and feeling his brother’s gaze burning into his slumped shoulders.

_Please…_

*

     Another hour had passed in tense silence, broken only by Hanzo’s deep breathing as his brother finally gave way to weariness, and Genji’s lips twitched slightly as he glanced at the other man. He was just turning his attention back to the doors when his patience was rewarded by the sound of footsteps approaching, and he was on his feet, nearly colliding with the door when it opened, and Angela’s startled noise was enough to rouse Hanzo. However, Genji was blind to that, eyes fixated on the curtains that had been drawn around the furthest bed in the infirmary, before he turned to Angela, noting in a split second that she had changed and that she looked exhausted, eyes red-rimmed and shadowed.

“Angela…?” It had been a long time since he’d seen her look like that, and he trailed off unable to voice the question. For a moment she looked surprised, gaze flicking between him and Hanzo, before comprehension dawned and she smiled, a weary quirk of her lips that was only little more than a grimace.

“He’s going to be fine.”

     Genji hadn’t realised how much he had dreaded not hearing those words, or how much he had needed to hear them and for a split second his knees quivered, relief threatening to fell him, and it was only the supportive hand that appeared on his shoulder that let him hold steady. “He…You’re sure?” He knew better than anyone to question her judgement, and yet he needed to be sure, the small voice of doubt refusing to be dissuaded so easily. _Too late…too late…_

“It was close.” The admission wasn’t what he wanted to hear, but it was better than a blithe reassurance or the sharp rebuttal he had been half-expecting. “Closer, than I want to think about, but I promise you that he will be up and about again in a few days.”

_Alive. He’s alive._

“Can I see him?”

“Not tonight. He’s resting at the moment, and I think we all need to sleep,” Angela replied, gentleness giving way to steel as she eyed him and Genji grimaced, imagining how exhausted he must look to have garnered that look. He felt tired and stretched thin, but he also knew that he wouldn’t be able to settle, let alone sleep until he saw for himself that Lúcio was going to be okay and he opened his mouth to protest. “You can see him tomorrow though.” There was a note of finality as she cut him off before he could say anything, and it was a tone he recognised all too well and realising that she wasn’t going to give way on the issue he nodded, allowing her to shepherd him and Hanzo away from the infirmary doors. Although he was unable to resist throwing a glance back over his shoulder as the infirmary doors swung shut, hiding the curtained off bed from sight.

**

     Genji slipped into the infirmary, knowing that his presence had been registered when the lighting brightened just enough to make the path to the bed easy to follow and he sighed, torn between cursing Athena for acknowledging he was there and gratitude. Not that he had ever thought that his visit would go unnoticed as Angela seemed to have a sixth sense about when someone had been in her domain, even if they didn’t cause trouble, or leave anything out of place. He felt a little guilty for sneaking back in, knowing that her orders to rest had been for everyone’s benefit, but at the same time, he knew that there would be no rest for him unless he did this.

He just needed to see for himself.

    So, why were his steps slowing as he neared the bed, faltering at the steady mechanical beeps of the machines hidden behind the curtains? _Too late,_ the part of him that still doubted, that still feared to hope, echoed loudly in the quiet and he growled under his breath before stalking forward, although he was quiet as he drew back one of the curtains just enough to slip inside.

   His first glimpse of Lúcio was just as arresting as the brief second their eyes had met had been, and he froze, eyes darting to the machines beeping away steadily, telling him what Angela had already said – it was bad, but he was doing okay. To the bandages that told him that she hadn’t been able to heal all the damage yet, the white expanse giving him some indication of how extensive the damage had been, covering Lúcio’s right shoulder and round his chest, down to where the blanket had slipped and out of sight. _What happened?_ That was a question for later though because right now all that mattered was that Lúcio was here, his soft breathing a gentle counterpart to the beeping, his chest rising and falling steadily, and the pain that Genji had glimpsed earlier has eased away.

_He’s alive._

     He was about to turn away and leave, trying to tell himself that was enough, when there was a groan from the bed as Lúcio shifted and Genji stepped forward, not sure what he was going to do. What he was going to say.

“Genji…?” Caught up in his thoughts he hadn’t noticed that Lúcio’s eyes had crept open, peering at him. They were clearer than they had been before, although still heavy-lidded, this time with exhaustion as he blinked heavily, glancing around, before returning to Genji, confusion taking root as he realised that Genji was on his own. “What…?”

“You…” Genji swallowed, realising that he hadn’t actually thought ahead to the part where Lúcio would be awake, and he would have to try and put into words the realisation and wishes that hit him earlier. “I was worried.” That didn’t come close to explaining how he’d been feeling, but it was the best he could do right now, and he grimaced, feeling awkward in a way that he had never felt during his days of being the Shimada ‘playboy’, and he glanced away.

“I’m sorry,” Lúcio murmured, and Genji jolted as a warm hand grasped his, and he looked back, to see the wry twist of Lúcio’s lips. “I scared myself.” There was a distant look in his eyes, and Genji knew that he was recalling what had happened and he stepped closer, cautiously letting his fingers curl around Lúcio’s, trying to give him something to ground himself with. It seemed to work as Lúcio blinked heavily before glancing at him, but while he seemed more present, there was some undefinable emotion in his eyes as he looked up at him. “You were there…when they brought me back.”

     It wasn’t really a question, but Genji nodded all the same, mouth strangely dry. If anything, Lúcio looked more confused by the confirmation, but his grip tightened. “I…” He trailed off, and Genji was struck by how small and vulnerable he looked right now, visibly fighting the pull of exhaustion as he blinked heavier than before, carefully avoiding Genji’s gaze as he continued in a soft voice. “I thought that I wasn’t going to see you again…”

_Too late…_

  Genji could hear an echo of the doubt that had haunted him all afternoon in those quiet words, and even though part of him was trying to quell the hope the had flickered to life with those same words, bracing himself against them meaning something else, he pulled their hands closer to his chest. “I’m right here, and so are you.” _So are you,_ he repeated silently, finally letting himself believe it as he felt the warmth of Lúcio’s skin against his and saw the life in the eyes that darted to their linked hands and then up to his face. It seemed to light a fire in him, and he swallowed before lifting his gaze to meet Genji’s.

“You…” Lúcio’s nerve seemed to break for a moment, and he shifted, grimacing as the movement pulled on his injuries and Genji half expected him to pull away. Instead, the pain seemed to encourage him to continue.  “It was your face I saw, and your voice that I heard when I went down.” His voice was getting softer with each word, his gaze not quite meeting Genji’s at this point. “When I…” _Thought I was going to die,_ Genji heard the unspoken words, reminded painfully of the memory from earlier, and he opened his mouth, wanting to comfort even though his thoughts were whirling from what Lúcio said.

    The reassurance died on the tip of his tongue as Lúcio’s eyes closed, only to struggle open and then droop once more a moment later. Genji bit back a sigh, remembering Angela’s words and seeing the evidence in front of him – rest was more important than whatever the hell this was, even though the flicker of hope had him wanting to get answers, to reach for what was being dangled in front of him. A look at Lúcio’s exhausted features, lines of pain beginning to reappear quelled that urge.

 

“Tell me again when you’re not falling asleep,” Genji murmured, feeling the hand holding his go lax and begin to fall away, catching it before it could hit the bed and smiling as he realised that Lúcio was already asleep, chest rising and falling evenly. He squeezed Lúcio’s fingers before lifting to his lips and pressing a kiss to the tips, as he added softly. “And then I might believe you.”

_And I might be able to say the words in return…_

 


End file.
